A few weeks ago--meaning this review should have been posted long ago--I read Pretend You Love Me (originally titled Far From Xanadu) by Julie Anne Peters. I preface this review by saying that Peters is one of my absolute favorite writers. Three of the four books of hers that I own are LGBT-oriented--this book being one of them--and I must say that this one did not disappoint. I enjoyed reading a novel of a lesbian in a small town where she was just accepted as that, because when you think of small towns and gay culture, the standard stereotype is a bunch of redneck, Bible-hugging, closed-minded individuals who are ready to run the homos out of town. This book wasn't anything like that. What I think I liked most was that the fact that Mike (whose birth name is Mary Elizabeth) doesn't flaunt that she's a lesbian, and you sort of forget about that fact and are more focused on the crush she has without really considering gender a part of the problem, just that Xanadu only sees her as a friend.
In the beginning, I, like the characters in the novel, was enamored by Xanadu. She's the city girl who moves to the middle of nowhere with this intense backstory of drugs and death. But while Mike falls deeper and deeper in love with Xanadu, my feelings for her followed that of Jamie (Mike's gay male counterpart), whose fascination with Xanadu reaches a peak and then peters out into a deep loathing. Xanadu truly takes Mike and readers on a wild ride. It was difficult to put the book down, so most of the time I didn't.
I highly recommend this book to anyone who enjoys LGBT fiction. I also recommend this to anyone who enjoys Young Adult fiction. I give this novel an 8 out of 10. You can acquire this book at this link.
Thursday, September 29, 2011
Friday, September 23, 2011
035
It's hard to go back to school after graduation. Even after two post-graduation visits to the city of my alma mater, this trip still had its ups and downs. A lot of things change once you've been away from people for a lengthy amount of time. This can be a good thing or a bad thing.
On a Walmart excursion, I ran into the chapter president of my sorority, who at least seemed very happy to see me and welcomed me with a hug. I admit that I was not one of the easiest sorority women to deal with during my final year as a collegiate. In fact, I'd even go as far as to say that I was hard-skinned and difficult to get along with. I am surprised I still have friends within my sorority because of the way I treated people, and for that I will always be sorry. If I regretted a single thing in my life, that might be it. I know I don't deserve the friends I have, but I'm so thankful for them. I'm also thankful that some people have found a place in their hearts to forgive me for the things I put them through.
On the bad end of change, I have to admit that there's something bittersweet about being on the outside looking in at recruitment. While I know that I'm still a member of my sorority, as an alumna, it's not the same. There is a sort of disconnectedness to watching collegiates welcome new sisters--especially admitting to myself that I will never know these new women like the women I call sisters will. Only fellow alumnae can understand how that feels. I was taught to trust my sisters' judgment when it comes to voting on new members, and I do trust them, with all my heart; but there will always be that part of me that wonders what it was that made my sisters vote yes on these women--what did they see?
From here, I had more to say--much more to say. However, no words can really sum up how I feel without elaborate backstory and placing unnecessary blame on both myself and others. So, for now, that is all. I'm hoping this may help prepare my sisters--and perhaps women of other sororities--to prepare for life outside the collegiate world, because it is definitely a difficult transition.
On a Walmart excursion, I ran into the chapter president of my sorority, who at least seemed very happy to see me and welcomed me with a hug. I admit that I was not one of the easiest sorority women to deal with during my final year as a collegiate. In fact, I'd even go as far as to say that I was hard-skinned and difficult to get along with. I am surprised I still have friends within my sorority because of the way I treated people, and for that I will always be sorry. If I regretted a single thing in my life, that might be it. I know I don't deserve the friends I have, but I'm so thankful for them. I'm also thankful that some people have found a place in their hearts to forgive me for the things I put them through.
On the bad end of change, I have to admit that there's something bittersweet about being on the outside looking in at recruitment. While I know that I'm still a member of my sorority, as an alumna, it's not the same. There is a sort of disconnectedness to watching collegiates welcome new sisters--especially admitting to myself that I will never know these new women like the women I call sisters will. Only fellow alumnae can understand how that feels. I was taught to trust my sisters' judgment when it comes to voting on new members, and I do trust them, with all my heart; but there will always be that part of me that wonders what it was that made my sisters vote yes on these women--what did they see?
From here, I had more to say--much more to say. However, no words can really sum up how I feel without elaborate backstory and placing unnecessary blame on both myself and others. So, for now, that is all. I'm hoping this may help prepare my sisters--and perhaps women of other sororities--to prepare for life outside the collegiate world, because it is definitely a difficult transition.
Monday, September 12, 2011
034
I usually don't double post like KEE, but sometimes things just happen.
Tonight I went to the Orioles game with my dad. It was sort of a last minute decision since my mom couldn't go and they have season tickets, so we headed out. As a backhistory, I should explain that my relationship with my father is more or less non-existent. From the age of eleven, until I turned eighteen, our conversations could be summed up to volleyball, goal-setting, and grades. When I started college, I passed up the opportunity to play volleyball in order to focus on my studies and, admittedly, free myself from the pressure put upon me by my father. So, then, our conversations were focused on how the volleyball team at school was doing, goals, and football. Since then, we talk about football, and occasionally he gets on my back about finding a job.
On the way to the game today, it was a relatively normal conversation. The Redskins won last night, so there was a cause for celebration. Likewise, the Cowboys lost to the Jets. In response to his surprise that the Cowboys lost, after leading by fourteen; I agreed that I was happy that the Cowboys lost but not so thrilled about the Jets winning. Once upon a time, I would have been happy about this, but now the Jets hold no significance in my life. My father--not so astute--asked why I don't like the Jets. I responded very shortly that it was because of my ex. As I said, my father and I don't talk about things outside of sports and the future. Needless to say, interpersonal relationships fall outside of the realm of normalcy, most especially regarding my ex-girlfriend. The words that came out of my father's mouth were so simple and yet so meaningful: "Oh, she like them?"
In the four years since I have come out to my parents as bisexual, this is the first time I have heard him acknowledge my attraction to women or any relationship that I have had with a woman--at least in front of me. Even when I had my then-girlfriend visit a year and a half ago, he barely said more than two words to her. My mother has always been the supportive one. She has always accepted my sexuality for as long as I can remember, saying that it's only a small piece of who I am--so insignificant to the big picture. While my dad isn't waving around a rainbow flag or attending PFLAG meetings, it just means a lot to know that he's not pretending that part of me doesn't exist, because that's how I usually feel when he says, "Emily, that boy over there's kind of cute," or "Oh, you have a date with a boy?"
I don't expect anyone to say, "What do you think of that girl?" I don't need someone to ask me these things, but I don't like pretending to be straight. Even if I date a man--hell, even if I marry a man--I will still be a bisexual woman. I will not go back into the closet.
Tonight I went to the Orioles game with my dad. It was sort of a last minute decision since my mom couldn't go and they have season tickets, so we headed out. As a backhistory, I should explain that my relationship with my father is more or less non-existent. From the age of eleven, until I turned eighteen, our conversations could be summed up to volleyball, goal-setting, and grades. When I started college, I passed up the opportunity to play volleyball in order to focus on my studies and, admittedly, free myself from the pressure put upon me by my father. So, then, our conversations were focused on how the volleyball team at school was doing, goals, and football. Since then, we talk about football, and occasionally he gets on my back about finding a job.
On the way to the game today, it was a relatively normal conversation. The Redskins won last night, so there was a cause for celebration. Likewise, the Cowboys lost to the Jets. In response to his surprise that the Cowboys lost, after leading by fourteen; I agreed that I was happy that the Cowboys lost but not so thrilled about the Jets winning. Once upon a time, I would have been happy about this, but now the Jets hold no significance in my life. My father--not so astute--asked why I don't like the Jets. I responded very shortly that it was because of my ex. As I said, my father and I don't talk about things outside of sports and the future. Needless to say, interpersonal relationships fall outside of the realm of normalcy, most especially regarding my ex-girlfriend. The words that came out of my father's mouth were so simple and yet so meaningful: "Oh, she like them?"
In the four years since I have come out to my parents as bisexual, this is the first time I have heard him acknowledge my attraction to women or any relationship that I have had with a woman--at least in front of me. Even when I had my then-girlfriend visit a year and a half ago, he barely said more than two words to her. My mother has always been the supportive one. She has always accepted my sexuality for as long as I can remember, saying that it's only a small piece of who I am--so insignificant to the big picture. While my dad isn't waving around a rainbow flag or attending PFLAG meetings, it just means a lot to know that he's not pretending that part of me doesn't exist, because that's how I usually feel when he says, "Emily, that boy over there's kind of cute," or "Oh, you have a date with a boy?"
I don't expect anyone to say, "What do you think of that girl?" I don't need someone to ask me these things, but I don't like pretending to be straight. Even if I date a man--hell, even if I marry a man--I will still be a bisexual woman. I will not go back into the closet.
033--Book Review Monday
I haven't done a book review in about three weeks, and now I've finished two books. I'll share one with you and save the other for this Friday (hopefully--if I'm not too busy).
During vacation--which I know was almost a month ago--I read The Ex-Debutante, by Linda Francis Lee. This was one of those books that I bought on a whim because it was marked down and had a pretty cover. Legitimately, that was the reasoning. The only way to describe this book is the novel equivalent of Sweet Home Alabama gone romance novel. While there is a rather intimate scene between our main character, Carlisle, and her college sweetheart, Jack; I wouldn't rank it quite as explicit as some romance novels, but the passion is certainly there. Carlisle, a once-debutante-now-lawyer, must return home to Willow Creek, Texas to settle her mother's fifth divorce, leaving her fiance in Boston. Apart from spending her time in the courtroom, opposing Jack Blair in both feelings and legalities; Carlisle must also acquire eight graduating girls, polish them up, and present them as young women at Willow Creek's Annual Debutante Ball.
While this novel was very similar to the storyline of Sweet Home Alabama--new life in the city, old life in country, lying to one's fiance, falling for an old flame, etc--it was very different from the books I usually read, and I enjoyed it much more than I thought I would.
I would give this book an 8 out of 10--highly recommended. If you would like to buy this book, here is a link, via Barnes and Noble--because I'm afraid it will go out of business like Borders--http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/ex-debutante-linda-francis-lee/1100356776?ean=9780312354985&itm=4&usri=linda%2bfrancis%2blee.
Happy Reading!
During vacation--which I know was almost a month ago--I read The Ex-Debutante, by Linda Francis Lee. This was one of those books that I bought on a whim because it was marked down and had a pretty cover. Legitimately, that was the reasoning. The only way to describe this book is the novel equivalent of Sweet Home Alabama gone romance novel. While there is a rather intimate scene between our main character, Carlisle, and her college sweetheart, Jack; I wouldn't rank it quite as explicit as some romance novels, but the passion is certainly there. Carlisle, a once-debutante-now-lawyer, must return home to Willow Creek, Texas to settle her mother's fifth divorce, leaving her fiance in Boston. Apart from spending her time in the courtroom, opposing Jack Blair in both feelings and legalities; Carlisle must also acquire eight graduating girls, polish them up, and present them as young women at Willow Creek's Annual Debutante Ball.
While this novel was very similar to the storyline of Sweet Home Alabama--new life in the city, old life in country, lying to one's fiance, falling for an old flame, etc--it was very different from the books I usually read, and I enjoyed it much more than I thought I would.
I would give this book an 8 out of 10--highly recommended. If you would like to buy this book, here is a link, via Barnes and Noble--because I'm afraid it will go out of business like Borders--http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/ex-debutante-linda-francis-lee/1100356776?ean=9780312354985&itm=4&usri=linda%2bfrancis%2blee.
Happy Reading!
Thursday, September 8, 2011
032
Make a list of five ways you've changed in the last five years.
1. I have lost a significant amount of weight. When I was in high school, I weighed about 135, and now I'm anywhere between 115 and 120, which makes me very happy. Not only do I look slimmer, but I find myself more confident in my own skin.
2. I am more comfortable being alone. While I don't like sitting alone in my house or anything like that, I like being unattached. I used to feel like I couldn't be happy if I wasn't in a relationship, and now I'm really happy with my freedom.
3. I am more outspoken. This comes mostly from working retail, in which I am told to "Smile and say hi" to every customer.
4. I am definitely more of a cynic. I think my cynicism is part of the reason I am so much happier being single. Or maybe I'm just more realistic; life can't always end happily ever after.
5. Finally, I'm definitely less innocent than I was as a senior in high school. I was very much reserved and a do-gooder in high school. College allowed me to get outside my comfort zone, and since then I have toned down my behavior considerably, but I'm obviously more mature all around.
1. I have lost a significant amount of weight. When I was in high school, I weighed about 135, and now I'm anywhere between 115 and 120, which makes me very happy. Not only do I look slimmer, but I find myself more confident in my own skin.
2. I am more comfortable being alone. While I don't like sitting alone in my house or anything like that, I like being unattached. I used to feel like I couldn't be happy if I wasn't in a relationship, and now I'm really happy with my freedom.
3. I am more outspoken. This comes mostly from working retail, in which I am told to "Smile and say hi" to every customer.
4. I am definitely more of a cynic. I think my cynicism is part of the reason I am so much happier being single. Or maybe I'm just more realistic; life can't always end happily ever after.
5. Finally, I'm definitely less innocent than I was as a senior in high school. I was very much reserved and a do-gooder in high school. College allowed me to get outside my comfort zone, and since then I have toned down my behavior considerably, but I'm obviously more mature all around.
Saturday, September 3, 2011
031
10 Ways a Workplace and a Sorority are Alike
1. You join for one reason and stay for the people.
In a sorority, you rush for any variety of reasons--to make friends, too add to your resume, to gain leadership opportunities, etc--and you apply for a job for money. In the end, even if you don't like the amount of work it takes to exist in either situation, you will remain where you are because of the people who make it worth it.
2. You put more into in than you think you get out of it.
At work, you are constantly busting your ass (at least in your eyes), and that minimum wage paycheck feels like someone is laughing at your misfortune; but in time, that money adds up. In a sorority, you go to countless meetings, do endless hours of community service, and push your way through weeks of recruitment; and it seems like there's no silver lining. Bid Day is the silver lining, when you find new women who will become your sisters.
3. If someone is removed from the situation, no one talks about it--just whispers.
In a sorority, when someone's membership is terminated--whether it is by their own choice or circumstances beyond their control--it is not something that is spoken about, except in hushed whispers between curious members. At work, when someone is fired, a manager doesn't tell a soul, but everyone notices when the individual stops showing up, and that's when the rumors start.
4. If you've been away for a long time, you're welcomed back with open arms.
At work, if you go on vacation, the day you come back everyone will be happy to see you, even if you left on bad terms. After graduation, if you visit your chapter, your sorority sisters will embrace you, and all past drama will be swept under the rug.
5. People have romantic relationships with one another, but they are kept a secret.
Therefore, everyone knows and whispers about it.
6. There are people you don't always get along with, but you always remain civil because that's what is best for the group as a whole.
In a sorority, you are sisters--no matter what. At work, you can't escape them, so you might as well put up with them.
7. If you don't like authority and rules, this is not for you.
At work, you can get away with breaking some rules, like having your cell phone on you; but you can't get away with the big stuff, like stealing. In a sorority, you can get away with breaking some rules, like wearing stitched letters with ripped jeans; but you can't get away with the big stuff, like talking to a rushee during formal recruitment outside of events.
8. Each store/chapter is different but upholds the same policies and procedures.
In a sorority, each chapter has different local traditions but believes the same principles. At work, each store has different arrangements of departments and clothing but offer the same sales.
9. You are constantly convincing an outsider of something.
At work, you are trying to convince a customer that they really need your credit card to fulfill their shopping needs. In a sorority, you are convincing a rushee to pledge to your sorority.
10. When things get to be too much, you want out; but you know you'd regret it if you did.
At work, if you quit you know you'll have no money. In a sorority, you know if you terminated your membership, you'd wake up everyday thinking you're a part of something that you never could be again.
1. You join for one reason and stay for the people.
In a sorority, you rush for any variety of reasons--to make friends, too add to your resume, to gain leadership opportunities, etc--and you apply for a job for money. In the end, even if you don't like the amount of work it takes to exist in either situation, you will remain where you are because of the people who make it worth it.
2. You put more into in than you think you get out of it.
At work, you are constantly busting your ass (at least in your eyes), and that minimum wage paycheck feels like someone is laughing at your misfortune; but in time, that money adds up. In a sorority, you go to countless meetings, do endless hours of community service, and push your way through weeks of recruitment; and it seems like there's no silver lining. Bid Day is the silver lining, when you find new women who will become your sisters.
3. If someone is removed from the situation, no one talks about it--just whispers.
In a sorority, when someone's membership is terminated--whether it is by their own choice or circumstances beyond their control--it is not something that is spoken about, except in hushed whispers between curious members. At work, when someone is fired, a manager doesn't tell a soul, but everyone notices when the individual stops showing up, and that's when the rumors start.
4. If you've been away for a long time, you're welcomed back with open arms.
At work, if you go on vacation, the day you come back everyone will be happy to see you, even if you left on bad terms. After graduation, if you visit your chapter, your sorority sisters will embrace you, and all past drama will be swept under the rug.
5. People have romantic relationships with one another, but they are kept a secret.
Therefore, everyone knows and whispers about it.
6. There are people you don't always get along with, but you always remain civil because that's what is best for the group as a whole.
In a sorority, you are sisters--no matter what. At work, you can't escape them, so you might as well put up with them.
7. If you don't like authority and rules, this is not for you.
At work, you can get away with breaking some rules, like having your cell phone on you; but you can't get away with the big stuff, like stealing. In a sorority, you can get away with breaking some rules, like wearing stitched letters with ripped jeans; but you can't get away with the big stuff, like talking to a rushee during formal recruitment outside of events.
8. Each store/chapter is different but upholds the same policies and procedures.
In a sorority, each chapter has different local traditions but believes the same principles. At work, each store has different arrangements of departments and clothing but offer the same sales.
9. You are constantly convincing an outsider of something.
At work, you are trying to convince a customer that they really need your credit card to fulfill their shopping needs. In a sorority, you are convincing a rushee to pledge to your sorority.
10. When things get to be too much, you want out; but you know you'd regret it if you did.
At work, if you quit you know you'll have no money. In a sorority, you know if you terminated your membership, you'd wake up everyday thinking you're a part of something that you never could be again.
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